There's no need to disregard all the data that came hard
Just because the points don't fit the line
Do a transformation to decrease the information
Do statistics, and it will look just fine.
When the numbers don't uphold what's been previously told
and your favorite theory's looking kinda' low
To the theory be true, make your training work for you
Do statistics, and no one will know.
Folks who ask for data want to complicate the matter
But facts would just confuse the settled mind
Put your model front and center, disregard the lone dissenter
Interpret, as you studied, double blind.
In those years of education, you were trained in obfuscation
A dozen graphs from each new theory flow.
By mere manipulations, multiply your publications,
Do statistics! and your name and fame will grow.
And when your time is near and for judgement you appear
with reams of reprints poorly understood,
Don't tell them that you strayed from both sides of that narrow way,
But tell them -on the average -you were good.
Bud Banis (circa 1970)